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EmailTIP: Sometimes it’s
easier for an outside observer to read the signs than it is for the actual
participant.
Keep a friend with you when you visit a
bar or go to the clubs. That buddy will make it easier for you to make the
correct judgment about a woman you’re interested in. If you chose to bring
along a male or a female as your buddy, he or she can observe the signs from a
woman better than you could alone. It’s a simple case of“What you think you
see” versus “What you want to see”. A woman’s body language can tell you a lot
about what she is interested in. Her body language can also tell you a lot
about what type of person she is.
TIP: Let your buddy
observe what you don’t.
Sometimes a woman observes a man who is
totally unaware of being watched. If you have a friend with you, he or she
could scan the area and see who is checking you out. If you accidently return
the eye contact, you would have only a few seconds to initiate the
communication with her. If you don’t, she could view you as incompetent.
Therefore, buy yourself the luxury of not being on a time limit by allowing
someone else to be your eyes. When he or she notify you of a potential
interested mate, take your time and think of way to approach her.
TIP: Be aware of the
signs of rejection.
Nothing is worse than being unfamiliar
of when you are making her uncomfortable with your methods. Be aware that women
ignore your smile and eye contacts, if there are no immediate interest. Other
body languages she may have would be her turning away when you approach.
Sometimes she would cross her arms or legs as a form of self-defense. Keep in
mind, those signs only mean that you will have to prove yourself because it is
very hard for her to judge your book by the cover. If you see the signs of
rejection then you will have to decide if you will prove yourself. Proving
yourself can take a lot of time, drinks and risks. Do not challenge the
rejection if she is not worth the reward. If she return eye contact and smiles,
then there are no rejections.
Here are negative signs of possible
rejections
- Arms
Crossed. Any type of defensive closed-up body posture indicates a barrier
between two people when they're conversing.
- Turning
his or her body away from you or giving no room for minimal physical
contact. As one gets uninterested in someone, one tries to move away and
reduce contact, and most forms of connection between the parties.
- Inattentiveness
to what you are saying
- Lack of
eye contact and staring away from your glances. Shifty eyes and blinking
eyes can indicate deception.
- Frequent
head nodding indicate a loss of connection most of the time.
- Yawning
may generally indicate a state of boredom and is a sure sign of lack of
interest.
TIP: Manage her
personal space
One trick that is hard to manage is
personal space. Everyone’s personal space is at a large distance when he or she
does not know each other. However, during a moment of a man approaching a
woman, this personal space is also part of the communication. Staying too far
away from her can send a negative message to her.
Possible messages
· You lack confidence in approaching
· You’re committed and self-conscience
with guilt
· Or perhaps you’re not
interested enough
To avoid those mixed messages, a man
should reach into her personal space with an offer of a hand shake. This is the
perfect moment to offer a drink. If a hand shake is too formal, then touch her
shoulder instead. Don’t worry about violating her personal space because you
were invited when she smiled. Maintain this causal touching by touching her
hand occasionally during a conversation with her.
TIP: Know the ice
breakers
Beginning the conversations can always
be difficult. Every woman’s personality, likes and dislikes are different from
woman to woman. Breaking the ice and getting a good conversation going can
actually be easy if only you knew something about her.
· Get
her name
This first step is as elementary as
knowing your own name. So, since you’ve known your own name since elementary
school, return yours after she gives you hers. The next step requires more
skills.
· Complement
her
At this early stage, you can lose her
attention very quickly, especially if she had been having conversations with
other people. Her mind is probably weighing her options of whom to talk to, or
if she should view you as a nice guy that got nowhere. Flatter her with a
simple complement. A complement would quickly reveal to a woman why she caught
your attention and won your curiosity. Here’s some do’s and don’ts when giving
complements.
· Tell
the truth. The most important quality shared by all meaningful compliments is
sincerity. It makes no sense to say she’s the most beautiful woman in the bar
or club, when your eyes are vulnerable to drift on someone else.
· Don’t
overdo it. Give one or at most two complements. Three or more complements will
get her embarrassed or worst yet, build up her immunity to it.
· Show
your personal interest with questions. Ask what her hobbies or leisure activities
are. Then use that interest of hers as a leading topic. This will decrease the
chances of her getting bored with the conversation.
TIP: Let her lead the
rate of the bond
Always follow up things she do, by
doing it yourself. If she laughs, then you laugh. If her leg touches yours,
then wait 30 seconds and let your leg touch hers. If she whispers in your ears,
then whisper back into hers. If she drinks, then you drink. If she feels like
dancing, then you feel like dancing.
TIP: Slowly take the
lead back
If she touched your leg more than once,
then touch her thigh. If she touch your shoulder or arm, then touch her back.
If she touch your upper back, then touch her lower back. If she gives you good
eye contact, then look at her lips. If she leans in halfway for a kiss, then
connect the distance with a kiss.
TIP: Escalation is a
good thing
Never slow down the pace with the
breaks. If things move quickly, then that is because of the chemistry. If
things get personal in an inappropriate area, then move to the appropriate
place.
TIP: End the moment
with an opener
Do not go to home base in one night. Grab her phone number. Remember: you want to become her friend so you can build a good reputation and network for future women she may know. Nothing works better than a good recommendation.
